I returned to Victoria on Monday and I really enjoyed being back with friends, wifi and being able to connect again with friends all over the world. Again I can’t thank Gail and Stuart enough for their friendship. I couldn’t imagine being here without them.
This week I have been securing jobs for the coming weeks and visiting turist points around Victoria. Yesterday I walked to Fisherman’s Wharf to look at the seals (they figured out that if they perform, they get more fish) and enjoyed the sun and signs of spring all around.
I also happened by a fantastic shop called Frances Gray on Yates St. The shop’s window dressing caught my eye and I would have gladly bought almost everything in there. The clothes fit my style perfectly and most of it was organic, which is even better! The shop also carries the funniest caps, so I might return for one of those. I restrained my spending to just a cup, but what a cup! I love blue and this momento will hopefully stay with me a long time – locally made here in Victoria.
But all that time on my hands this week has also caused a rush of thoughts. I have been wondering if Canada is right for me, or if I should be somewhere else. Canada is treating me well, my friends here are the best and I get to see this beautiful country, so why am I not over the moon excited and happy all the time? Even before coming over here I was in this mellow state of acceptance. Those of you who know me personally, know that I live life to the fullest, so being in this mellow state is puzzling to say the least. Some of you may think that just coming over here, is living life to the fullest, but not in my book.
A former employer told me when I quit the job with her, that I was impatient. At the time I didn’t agree with her, but Heidi…maybe you are right! I feel like I am waiting for my life to take off in some way. Like it is just around the corner and I just need to locate the right corner. But the wait is really hard…specially being single and not having anyone to share it with.
So I reached out to some old friends and talked it over. See that is my process…I talk my issues over with friends. Walking around on my own does not help…it just makes me more frustrated, but a good discussion with my friends clears my mind and heart, and I have decided to give my Canadian adventure another chance. I’ve got some interesting jobs lined up for the coming weeks and you never know what it might lead to. And if I still feel the same frustration and mellowness, well, I guess I will change my plans and go somewhere else. I have to find that corner, no matter where it is.
